Month: January 2016

Birth of a Maneater

Posted on by The Sassy Single

Stork Maneater

Now that I’ve written a few posts, this would probably be a good time to shed a little light on why my site is called Memoirs of a Maneater.  You might be wondering why I chose this particular name when I’ve just been rambling on about how I like to do yoga…not exactly relevant.  I’ve actually had this phrase floating around my mind since college, when my friends and I joked that if I ever wrote an autobiography, it should be titled “Memoirs of a Maneater.”  (Shoutout to my college roommate who I’m sure is one of the 3 people that actually read this)

So how does one become a maneater?  Well for me it isn’t so much that I have oodles of men clamoring to date me and I just chew them up and spit them out.  (In all honesty, that’s only happened a few times)
It’s more about the fact that before I even turned 17, I made the decision that dating would not be a priority in my life.  I didn’t have a mission to find Mr. Right and I valued the friendships I had (and still have) with my girlfriends far more than any potential boyfriend.  I realized early on that the gossip and drama dating brought to my life was just not worth it.
I’m honest enough to say that I can be VERY cynical towards love and relationships.  I encountered some very poor excuses for young men in high school and those bad experiences stuck with me.  Since then, there have been plenty of men over the years that just didn’t stand a chance if they actually did want to date me.
Casual makeouts and sleepovers in college?  Sure, I was down with that.  But if a guy asked me out on an actual date or wanted to hang out more regularly I would shut them down without a second thought.  Like men typically act, I had the tendency to avoid anything that resembled commitment or could be labeled as official.  My relationship status on Facebook would forever be listed as single and no college boy was going to change that.  Thus, a maneater was born.
So now that I’ve given you a little background, expect to see some new posts soon about my antics and experiences dealing with men over the past decade.  Some good, some bad, and some just plain weird!

New Years Resolutions Are Overrated

Posted on by The Sassy Single

Well, it’s officially 2016!  If you are a living breathing human being, then you know this means lots of talk about making New Years Resolutions.

Well, I have zero resolutions this year and I’m actually okay with that.

Why??  Because I think that people make WAAAY too big of a deal about them! To be honest, I think that retailers now use them to take advantage of people as consumers.  Now, the New Year is an opportunity to promote a new fad diet, sell exercise equipment and workout clothing, or convince you to try a juice cleanse.  I do fully support anyone who wants to start working out or eating better.  Those are good goals to have!  However, after suffering from an eating disorder for 12 years of my life, I realize that these resolutions can quickly turn extreme or unhealthy.  I know that this is not the case for everyone.  For me and so many others though, it can be hard to ignore those constant advertisements about dramatic weight loss, having a six pack, or  getting your body bikini ready.  There is so much pressure on us from society to look a certain way and it concerns me.  I remember all of those diets I tried over the years and the overexercising I did.  I see young people doing the same thing now and it makes me sad.

I wasted so many years of my life being obsessed with losing weight and now that I’m in recovery, I don’t want to see others make the mistakes I did.  Now, I exercise because I enjoy it, not because I need to burn a certain amount of calories.  I do still set goals sometimes (I ran my first half marathon last fall) but I have a completely different outlook on physical activity.  When training for a race, I quickly realized that I needed to eat more and fuel my body for long runs.  Before going to hot yoga class, I know that I have to drink as much water as I can so that I won’t be dehydrated.

There are still times that I struggle, but when I look back to how I was four or five years ago, I’m shocked at how far I’ve come.  All of my progress didn’t come quickly or easily.  It most definitely was NOT part of a New Years Resolution.  What it really was: 5 years of extremely hard work to overcome a serious eating disorder.   (I should mention with the help of a residential treatment center and regular outpatient therapy-so necessary!)

So to anyone reading this, I urge you to rethink your idea of New Years Resolutions, especially if it has to do with diet and exercise.  Are you doing it for the right reasons?  Are you being realistic in your goals?  Often people get discouraged or give up because they’ve set goals that are unattainable.  Those are important things to consider.

Also, you don’t need a new year to start something; you can make resolutions daily.  Every day is a new opportunity.  If you’re committing to a big change, realize that the results won’t come overnight or even in a few months.  Good things take time…a lot of it!  It’s been five years since I left residential treatment and I still consider myself to be recovering in some ways.  Don’t lose hope, and remember that change isn’t easy.  In my case though, change was necessary and so worth it.