Girl Power

Feminist & Proud

Posted on by The Sassy Single

Hello again to those of you reading!  It’s been a while since my last post and to be honest, I’ve been struggling with ideas on what to write about next.  I have so many ideas and opinions that I want to share with the world, but sometimes I find myself hesitating to share my opinion.  Although I am truly fearless about a lot of things in life, I’m still held back by this overwhelming need to please people and often avoid sharing certain opinions if I think they will be somewhat controversial.  I know that sometimes sharing my opinion will cause people to label me as a bitch, when in actuality I’m just speaking my mind.

A perfect example of this is my feminist beliefs.  A few weeks ago was International Women’s Day, and from the news articles & social media posts I saw, there were a lot of men questioning the existence of this day.  Being the feminist that I am, I so badly wanted to share my feelings on why I think that day is so important.  Every time I saw a post of a man asking when International Men’s Day is, I got upset at their ignorance.  (For the record, there is actually a designated International Men’s Day in November for all the complainers)  So, without further adieu, here is my ‘bitchy’ take on this topic.

  • There’s a reason society has a designated International Women’s Day-mainly because there is still a TON of inequality that females all around the world experience every day. 

-Remember 100 years ago, when women in the United States still didn’t have the right to vote?  Kind of important don’t you think?  I also think it’s incredibly inspirational to see how far women in the US have come since we’ve gained the right to vote.  I am so thankful for the women who have paved the way for us.

-If you think that’s ‘ancient history’ (it’s not by the way) then how about the fact that women only make 76% of what men are paid for the same job?  As someone who works in a male dominated industry, I take this statistic seriously.  Being female, I am definitely the minority when it comes to my industry and the company I work for-I am literally one of two female employees where I work.  Over the years, I have been underestimated countless times just because I’m a woman.  I’ve had plenty of interactions where men don’t take me seriously at first-it’s like I have to prove that I know what I’m doing just because of my gender.  Recently, I found out that my boss has had to deal with several rumors and accusations that I was sleeping with him in the past years.  This happened mostly during my first few years that I worked for the company when I had received multiple promotions.  When I heard about this, I was so embarrassed and angry.  I realize that the rumors were mostly from jealous colleagues but it still upsets me.  I’ve advanced in my career because I work hard and do what I’m asked, being female should not have anything to do with it.  Hearing things like this often make me wonder how my experience would be different if I were simply a man.  I’m sure that I would be paid more and not always have to feel like I need to prove my value to others.

-Now, let’s take a look outside the United States and see how women are treated across the world.  Women like me are the lucky ones!  Are you a woman in Saudi Arabia?  It’s against the law for you to drive simply because you’re female.  How about many parts of Africa?  You might be able to drive, but genital mutilation is still widely performed on young girls & women in several regions.  Another terrible problem that kills at least 5000 women a year-honor killings.  In several countries across the Middle East and parts of Asia, it is actually legal for a family member to kill a woman for ‘dishonoring’ the family.  Examples of valid grounds for an honor killing?

  • Being a victim of rape.
  • Refusing to enter an arranged marriage.
  • Seeking a divorce.
  • Dressing or acting immodestly.
  • Homosexuality.

This truly makes me sick to my stomach to think about.  Especially when I see how privileged the men are in these societies.  They can literally get away with rape and murder!  This is a tragedy that people need to pay attention to.  So today, I am writing in the hopes that at least one person reads this and shares this information with others.  Male or female, we need to speak out about these injustices.  For years, I was hesitant to call myself a feminist because I didn’t want to be seen as radical.  Now, I am proud to say I am a feminist and it is my hope that my readers are too.

 

 

Birth of a Maneater

Posted on by The Sassy Single

Stork Maneater

Now that I’ve written a few posts, this would probably be a good time to shed a little light on why my site is called Memoirs of a Maneater.  You might be wondering why I chose this particular name when I’ve just been rambling on about how I like to do yoga…not exactly relevant.  I’ve actually had this phrase floating around my mind since college, when my friends and I joked that if I ever wrote an autobiography, it should be titled “Memoirs of a Maneater.”  (Shoutout to my college roommate who I’m sure is one of the 3 people that actually read this)

So how does one become a maneater?  Well for me it isn’t so much that I have oodles of men clamoring to date me and I just chew them up and spit them out.  (In all honesty, that’s only happened a few times)
It’s more about the fact that before I even turned 17, I made the decision that dating would not be a priority in my life.  I didn’t have a mission to find Mr. Right and I valued the friendships I had (and still have) with my girlfriends far more than any potential boyfriend.  I realized early on that the gossip and drama dating brought to my life was just not worth it.
I’m honest enough to say that I can be VERY cynical towards love and relationships.  I encountered some very poor excuses for young men in high school and those bad experiences stuck with me.  Since then, there have been plenty of men over the years that just didn’t stand a chance if they actually did want to date me.
Casual makeouts and sleepovers in college?  Sure, I was down with that.  But if a guy asked me out on an actual date or wanted to hang out more regularly I would shut them down without a second thought.  Like men typically act, I had the tendency to avoid anything that resembled commitment or could be labeled as official.  My relationship status on Facebook would forever be listed as single and no college boy was going to change that.  Thus, a maneater was born.
So now that I’ve given you a little background, expect to see some new posts soon about my antics and experiences dealing with men over the past decade.  Some good, some bad, and some just plain weird!

Single for the Holidays

Posted on by The Sassy Single

For all my single sisters out there-Let’s talk about being single for the holidays and why it’s sometimes difficult.

I know this feeling all too well and I’m sure others can relate.  You’re at a family gathering and an extended family member inevitably asks you if you’re dating anyone, when you’re going to get married, et cetera.  Here’s the thing:  it’s fine that they ask you this, but the reality is that IT’S OKAY TO BE SINGLE.  Really, it is!  It doesn’t matter if you’re 25 or 35, your worth should have nothing to do with whether or not you’re in a relationship.

In fact, here are some perks to being single for the holidays:

  • You don’t have to agonize over finding the perfect gift for your significant other.  Let’s be honest, women tend to put a lot more thought into gifts than men.  So this avoids a headache and is actually a major win for the single woman.
  • Less family gatherings to attend.  It can be seriously stressful trying to coordinate the holiday schedules of two different families and more often than not, you wind up hungover Christmas morning trying to psych yourself up for another family gathering that’s 200 miles away.  (From personal experience, it’s truly terrible)
  • You know that embarrassing relative that everyone has?  You don’t have to worry about them saying something inappropriate to your boyfriend if you don’t have one. 🙂
  • That midnight kiss on New Year’s Eve?  You actually have the opportunity to choose a man worthy of that honor.  And if you don’t find a man that’s up to par, who cares?  Just take a shot or share a quick peck with one of your girlfriends.  Or both! You’re single and can do what you want.  😉

Now I realize that there are also perks to being in a relationship during the holidays.  Sometimes it is nice to have a boyfriend to share these things with.  Well, maybe next year you will have someone special…Or maybe you won’t.  Either way, just remember that you are enough on your own.

Don’t settle for less than what you deserve just because all of your friends are engaged or married and you feel singled out.  It’s not worth sacrificing your self worth just to feel you like you’re following the rules of society.  Make your own path and inspire other single women not to settle either!

With that being said, I truly hope that anyone who reads this (even those of you who aren’t single) is having a wonderful holiday season.  Merry Christmas to all!

 

 

Let’s Pretend This is a Catchy Title

Posted on by The Sassy Single

Well, here it is!  My first blog post.  This is something I’ve been thinking about doing for a while and if anyone is actually reading this-I hope you have very low expectations 😉

But seriously, I won’t always have something super important to say or endless words of wisdom.  I’m just a sarcastic Midwestern girl in her late 20’s and I often feel like my life is one step away from a complete mess.  Luckily for everyone else, having a messy life means that sometimes you get REALLY good stories to share from your chaos.
So join me and and hopefully get a few smiles (maybe even a laugh) at my experiences.
Here are some things you can expect to hear about if you read my blog:
-My always interesting love life, or sometimes lack thereof.  Dozens of dating horror stories, my experiences as a professional third wheel, relationships that leave you asking WTF?
-Other fairly basic white girl topics:  my love of yoga, my dog, coffee, running, etc.
-Insight on eating disorders and the recovery process…it is difficult but so worth it!
-What it’s like to be a woman working in a male dominated industry.
I have absolutely no idea what I’ll be writing about first, but trust me, I have a LOT of stories to share.  So check back in and enjoy!